“I’d love to do that, but I’m too nervous.”
“I just don’t think I’m good enough.”
“Maybe one day.”
I think we’re all guilty of this bad habit sooner or later: we see people doing something we want to do, and we assume they’re braver, tougher, more competent than we are, and thus that ‘something’ is beyond our reach. It’s only for the fierce to chase.
Repeat after me. “WHY NOT ME?”
Why can’t you chase your goal? Why can’t you dream big? Why can’t you try something new? I’m sure half a dozen reasons popped into your head for each question, and you quickly slotted yourself back into a safe, comfortable place by telling yourself that there’s some limiting factor keeping you from even pursuing your dream.
Repeat after me. “I AM ALSO CAPABLE.”
Often, what’s limiting us isn’t time, money, or motivation. Though these things can and often do play a part, what you may actually be lacking is courage. It takes courage to try something new and risk looking silly while you learn. It takes courage to admit how big your dreams are, even to yourself, because it sometimes feels arrogant or greedy to want more than what you have. It takes courage to do something simply for the joy of it, whether or not it ever becomes successful, makes you money, or gives you fame.
Repeat after me. “MY DREAMS ARE AN IMPORTANT PART OF WHO I AM.”
Courage doesn’t have to be flashy, dramatic, or even all that big. Courage may be as simple as you setting aside thirty minutes, two times a week, to write, or paint, or dance, or study. That simple action says my dreams are important and they deserve my time. That can be scary! In a world that is all rush, all the time, setting boundaries for your own wellbeing and joy can often feel selfish and overwhelming.
Repeat after me. “I DO NOT NEED TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT RESPONSIBLY CHASING MY GOALS.”
Courage can start even smaller. It can look like you telling a trusted friend what your dream is. You don’t have to publish it to the world at large. You don’t have to shout it from a rooftop. If you’ve never felt comfortable voicing your dream before, then speaking it aloud for the first time is a huge step. I’m currently training for a marathon, and I’ve only told three or four people what my goal time is because it’s so ambitious and I’m almost embarrassed to admit how fast I think I can run. Feels like hubris. And while I’m not pushing out of that comfort zone just yet, I know it’s a little silly. Whether I hit that time or not, it doesn’t change who I am.
Repeat after me. “MY WORTH AND MY GOAL EXIST OUTSIDE OF EACH OTHER.”
I’ve said before that writing is for those with egos, but I should have said it’s for those with courage. But throw out your preconceived notions of what courage looks like. Each time you step outside of a comfort zone, you have become braver than you’ve ever been before.
